SCENARIO SIX

InSpired
I WILL LOVE AFTER WE HAD SEX!
The inception of any marital relationship is crucial to its permanence and success.​

Building Engineers understand the importance of the foundation of any structure: For the strength of any building structure is determined by its foundation.
​ 
The Bible recorded in Gen. 34;5 that Shechem, the son of the ruler of the Land desired Dinah as a wife ( which should be a good thing).

But the previous verses reveal a pattern of marriage proposal that l want us to examine.

He wanted her as a wife after he had sexual intercourse with her. The emergency marriage proposal from Shechem to Dinah is in the following order:

1. When Shechem son of Hamor the Hivite, the ruler of that area, saw her, (Dinah), he took her and raped her. 

2. His heart was drawn to Dinah daughter of Jacob;  ( affectionate attraction induced by physical pleasure)

4. he loved the young woman and spoke tenderly to her.  ( cruelty before sex and  loving attitudes and actions after it)

5. And Shechem said to his father Hamor, “Get me this girl as my wife.”

Permit me to outrightly say at this point that God's Word, which is the Believer' s authority on social behaviour condemns rape and pre-marital sex( sex outside marriage).
In this write-up, we are examining the Dinah marriage template in modern society 

The Dinah marriage template develops feelings of love after  intercourse. It is a template based on sexual pleasure and not friendship, divine purpose or compatibility.

Affection is developed as a result of satisfied sexual pleasure. This brings to mind the case of Amnon and Tamar, the sister of Absalom. (2 Samuel 13:1-15)

The Bible stated in the above passage that Amnon loved Tamar but this love turned to hatred after he violated her ( probably because Amnon was not satisfied  because of the unwillingness of his partner).

We have the Dinah template in various forms in modern Society
1.  The Prove that you love me by having sex with me syndrome
2. The 'How will l know we are compatible sexually if you don't sleep with me before our wedding night'
3. The 'Girl visit boy and boy put drugs into girl's drug and forcefully violated her scenario
4. The family of groom insist the girl must be pregnant before the marriage contract
5. The 'Since we are engaged, there is nothing wrong in having sexual intercourse before our wedding day. etc.

Developing strong affection for a partner after sex  is an unsafe perimeter for true love.

Societies in the World is ruled by this template- Hollywood, Bollywood, Noolywood, 'Asiawood', 'Europewood', 'Africawood' are mostly controlled by the mindset and attitudinal pattern of free sex and this should not find it way into the Church of Christ.

Major romance scripts in the media go thus:
"'Boy meets girl,'
'Boy have sex with girl'
' Boy gets attracted to girl'
'Boy falls in love with girl after sex:
'Boy falls out of love with girl' after many sexual encounters and sexual excitement has wear off'
' Boy leaves former girl for a new girl after sex which excitement is induced by a mindset of ' newness'

DANGER OF THE DINAH MARRIAGE TEMPLATE
1. It is against the Bible stardard for marriage. The Word of God condemns sex, pregnancy before marriage. 

2. It is the source of lots of hurt and pain for ladies and men alike. Many intend to see no reason to get married after they had ate the fruits of marriage before the wedding day.

3. It is majorly responsible for children born out of wedlock

4. Children not nurtured and trained in a family setting tend to turn out wrong and a danger to the society.

In my opinion, what sustains a marriage is not the high or low feelings but the mindset of commitment and unselfishness borne out of divine love and empowered by the Holy Spirit.

This helps a man or woman to stay within the confines of a legal marriage for all the pleasure and excitement they need for its permanence and success.

A.L. Hephzibah




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